Great news all around!

Follow me on twitter here.

While I didn't update yesterday due to a hell of a bad mood, I have nothing but great news to bring you today.

I played at a Starbucks yesterday and was told by a few people that i'm a pretty good singer/guitar player so a little bit of my low self esteem and confidence issues got chiseled at which felt good. But the biggest news is that after almost a year of filling out hundreds of applications I finally have a job. I'm now a cashier at The Dollar Tree, while it may not be very attractive of a position I don't really care, I just feel so relived and happy that I have a job ANYWHERE. It feels good to know that my hard work has finally payed off in what seems to be a fairly positive way. I still haven't gotten a call from Guitar Center but if I could land both jobs I would be very happy.

In related news, school is going very well. Good grades and all blah blah blah. A new review should be up soon since I know i've been pretty lazy lately.

I wish you guys all a wonderful day and leave you with an amazing performance by Boyce Avenue.

Guitar Center/Dollar Tree

Wanted to let you guys know that i've been really busy writing essays, recording music and a ton of other stuff. I know I posted about having a couple interviews and they both went really well! I should be getting a call on Friday letting me know what's up. I don't have much else to talk about so I will update tomorrow. Here is a random video for your viewing pleasure.

Last Night, Great News, and 100 Followers!

I had a great time at the Boyce Avenue show last night, it was one of the best shows I have seen in a long time. The lead singer was funny and had an amazing voice. It seems that as good things have I feel like good karma has started to catch up with me. Today I had an interview with Dollar Tree that went well AND tomorrow I have an interview with Guitar Center. I haven't felt this relieved in a long time. I'm hoping all the hard work I've put into job searching will finally pay off. Wish me luck guys!

ALSO, 100 FOLLOWERS!

Random Vid of the day!

Stupid people, Boyce Avenue, And Random Shit.

So, like I said yesterday i'm going to see Boyce Avenue tonight at the House of Blues. I can't wait, I need a little relaxation. At the moment i'm babysitting for my friend, for whatever reason she is just dancing and laughing right now, so not too hard of a job haha. So I met this girl a few days ago and here is a conversation I had with her earlier today, I want to see what you guys think.

Her: "I would just love to have a guy who will play guitar for me all the time lol."

Me: "I'm available lol."

Her: "What's your point?"

Me: "You do realize i'm a guitarist right?

Her: "Yeah, so?"

Me ". . ."

Her: "What?"

Me: "I'm just gonna let you sit and think about this for a while"

Her ":/ ok. . ."

It's hilarious, I would be upset but I don't want to date someone who has fecal matter for brains. I meet girls like this all the time, maybe it's Texas, this place isn't exactly known for geniuses.

To wrap up this post here is the best video EVER. . .of today.

I have no words.

My friends blog!

My best friend started a blog a while back check it out here!

Boyce Avenue

So I was feeling a bit low on inspiration so I decided to watch some videos by Boyce Avenue, they are most famous for their cover songs on youtube and I hadn't checked on them in a long time and I found they had a ton more videos and they all sound so much better than their old videos. Then I checked out their new original stuff and found out that these guys are so much better than I ever imagined. SO me and a friend are going to see them live tomorrow night and usually shows help me jump start my creative process and I can't wait to see them. Here is a cover they did of a Michael Jackson song, wether or not you like MJ you should check it out. Thanks guys for all the support and stuff yesterday by the way. Have a great day!

Also, check out my review of their new album here.

A Little Disappointed In Myself

I have to apologize for not posting anything yesterday, I usually post every day and I spent all day yesterday recording/sleeping so I may have missed a day but at least I will give you something to listen to soon!

I've been working on a 3 song digital EP that I'm gonna throw up on Itunes and probably just sell for a couple bucks, if it goes well then I'm gonna record a 6 song EP that I will release with hard copies, I'm really excited about that one to be honest.

So, what kind of music do you guys listen to? If I recorded a acoustic CD would you guys chck it out?

Making money the weird way.

Being that I lost my job quite a while ago, I've gotten into the habit of trying to find ways to make money without finding a job, unfortunately this isn't quite as easy as it sounded when I thought of it. I started like most people, I backed up all my DVD's and CD's to my computer and sold them all, I started finding random shit around the house I could sell on Ebay. Right now my biggest source of income is donating plasma, you can donate twice a week and my clinic gives about 60 bucks a week which is better than nothing. That and some surveys my local mall does for 75 bucks are my major source of income at the moment. Some friends suggest that I sign up for clinical trials for new medicines, and donate sperm. I'm trying to avoid those while I look for a job.

Do any of you do anything like this for money? Do you know of any other ways to make supplemental income while job searching?

New Music

Sitting in Starbucks, drinking a Black Eye. SO MUCH CAFFEINE. It's a cup of coffee with two espresso shots for those who don't know. Now you know. But on to different news.

Writing music is coming along fine. In fact I wanted you guys to check out a video I made of me playing part of a song I might use for my record. It's short but I think it sounds good. Also, the audio will only come out of one earphone, just wanted to let you guys know before you started complaining, it would annoy me too. I just can't seem to fix it, it only recorded to one side so if I try to level out the audio it just mutes all together.

You can watch that video here.

Not much is happening today other than that. So lets do the question for today! What is one thing(book, movie, song) you wish you could have been the person to write it and why(anything but for monetary reasons).

Also check out my review of Chuck Palanhucks(Spell Check someone?) newest book Snuff on my other blog at seankennyreviews.blogspot.com

The Little Things.

So I would like to start off by saying that someone messaged me yesterday who will not be named and told me that if I kept posting stuff about being depressed they would un-follow and not read my blog anymore. To them I say go ahead. I really don't care. This is a personal blog and if you don't like what i'm posting then leave. No skin off my nose.

Now onto normal stuff. So yesterday sucked just as much as I thought it would up to a certain point. As most of you have read we have had a lot of problems with our water at the house and our well had gotten really messed up. We called someone up to come fix it and they spent the day, V-Day of course, fixing it. When they were done my mom asked how much it would be for fixing it and the guy said "It's on me, happy valentines day!" and left. So as cynical and jaded as I am I guess i'm wrong. Maybe humanity isn't absolutely horrible, and maybe these days aren't as bad as I make them out to be.

So, lets do a new thingy. Lets do a question of the day.

What is something someone has done for you that maybe gave you more faith in humanity or vice-versa? Leave your replies in the comments below.

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Valentines Day Horrors

Well, it's the day. The big V-Day. The big corporate holiday where they try to convince us that if we are single we are worthless and if we are in a relationship that we need to love our significant other more than usual today! Today makes me sick. It really does. This is my 21st V-day alone and maybe i'm just jaded, maybe i'm just cynical. I don't care either way, this day makes me feel horrible just because I can't seem to find anyone to be with. then you have your friends who tell you "make it about your family and friends! It doesn't have to be about a relationship!" Well, yeah, except for everywhere you turn there is a V-day commercial, a couple holding hands, a romantic movie, a billboard, and it all just makes me want to vomit. Did the have to do this? Did they have to pick one day out of the year to make single people feel like they are less important than our infatuated counterparts? I had plans for today, plans for friends and family and such but pretty much everything has been broken and i'm going to spend most of the day alone. The grand finale will be getting drunk at a wing bar that has dollar beers tonight. I told somebody this and their reply was "I'm sure you'll meet someone there!" Jesus Christ, really? This kind of annoying optimism makes me sick. It's not that I hate being positive, I just enjoy being realistic. Nobody is going to pick up the 21 year old, jobless, drunk guy at the bar. It's fine I guess, i'm sure in a few years i'll be out celebrating today with a significant other and I'll try to be positive and optimistic with friends of mine who are in the same boat that i'm in now. Everything goes in cycles in a way. So maybe i'm just negative, cynical, jaded, but thats just how I am today. Tough break.

An Atheist In Church

Check out my movie reviews here.

I went to church today. I figured it would be good to step out of my comfort zone and give it a shot anyway. Unfortunately I felt really uncomfortable. This was not the fault of the church or church goers, everyone I met was really nice and really honest. For the first time I felt like I met some religious people who REALLY felt strong about what they believed in. they were very accepting and even though they knew I was an atheist never gave me any pressure or any harsh words. What made me uncomfortable was that the topic of the service was relationships, and was kind of huge in my face reminder that i'm single. I know they did this because V-Day is tomorrow and whatever but it kinda sucked. All in all though it was a good experience and it felt good to be accepted and not looked down upon by religious people because of my beliefs. More christians should strive to be as free of judgement as these were.

Also, I would like to say that I don't want anyone to argue about religion in the comments. Discussion is fine, just be respectful.

New review.

New review for It's Kind Of A Funny Story up at seankennyreviews.blogspot.com. There is a link to the left above my photo.

Meh, and not sure why.

I am happy, I am happy, I am happy, I am happy. One of my friends told me I could get over being depressed if I just tried to be postive and repeated this to myself over and over. I don't know if i'm not doing it enough but it doesn't seem to be working. I usually don't like to talk about being depressed just because people either think you are being over dramatic, whining, or whatever but fuck it. This is my blog and if I'm depressed I'm gonna talk about it.

the reason it really sucks is because usually I would have a reason i'm depressed and I could spend some time thinking about it and trying to solve that problem or get past it. Right now I don't have a reason to be sad. I really don't. I mean yeah, i'm single and a can't find a job but seriously? I have amazing friends, who care probably more than I know. I'm talented, i'm told that i'm funny. I have a house, a car, a loving family, a beautiful goddaughter. I don't know why i'm having such a hard time right now. Most people don't know though, i'm pretty good at faking it most of the time. I didn't really know what else to write about because it's all I can really think about. It sucks because half of my time i'm depressed and the other half i'm trying to figure out why i'm so depressed haha. It's a hell of a cycle.

Oh well, everything goes in cycles. Maybe a week from now i'll be the happiest person on the planet. Maybe it's naive to think that life should be a lot easier than this but whatever. Who knows what life is supposed to be anyway?

Here's hoping my next post will be more upbeat and maybe funny. Maybe that way I can keep my readers because you guys sure as well don't want to read shit like this every day. Take it easy guys.

My shirts

So, I totally forgot that I made some shirts back in the day. These designs are a little lame but if you like one feel free to pick one up, it helps me through school. You can see them here.

EDIT: To be honest, I would hardly call them designs.

The Parking Lot Movie.

Great movie. See my review here.

*All pictures are property of their respective owners*

School

Classes are getting kinda of ridiculous, I have a 600 word biography on Robert Hayden due soon and with it I have to include 2, 600 word essays about a critique of him. So, 1800 words all together. Besides that I guess everything else is a breeze, reading poetry and such. Not to hard for me but tedious of course. Creative Writing is annoying just because class just feels like High School, it's a lot less stressful than most classes but a little demeaning at times. We spent our entire last class playing a game that had nothing to do with writing at all. I guess it's better than three six hundred word papers though.

I spent today with India and my goddaughter Athena. It was good to have a relaxing day with them, it's been a long time since I had nothing to worry about for one day. I was lucky enough to have enough money where we could go eat and I could get a beer. Really makes me appreciate what I have instead of looking at what I don't have. Life is good today :)

Next Monday

Next Monday is Valentines Day. I would really rather drink bleach than go through that day. It will be my 21st without a date. I know every single person complains but seriously it's sickening. I have to put up with being the third wheel everywhere I go anyway, so lets make an entire day where I can feel like shit! Ugh, it's so self indulgent, people actually think the day means something when really it's just an excuse for some companies to make a shit ton off of idiot guys who think that the rose will make their girls give it up and idiot girls who think that a box of chocolates means that he loves them. I guess i'm just jaded and cyclical, I'm sure if I was in a relationship I would probably get caught up in all the bullshit too. At least I can admit it.

In other news the music writing is going well, the guitar parts are working beautifully. If you want me to upload a video of some of it let me know and i'll post one up here.

For anyone that's reading these, thank you. I just wanted to thank you guys. It feels good to have someone to talk to, wether it's just some random people on the internet or not does not lessen the good it does. I'm off to have a couple drinks and pass out. Cheers, Mates.

School Canceled/Lyrics/Black Swan

So, because of the weather school was cancled in north Texas. This would be understandable BUT I'm in college, we've already had a week canceled, the roads have no ice on them. I don't know about you guys but I like a day off every now and then but now I am a week and a half behind on classes. To be honest I want my tuition back if we don't get to everything in the syllabus because I need this education and I value it very highly. I don't want to skate through college, I want it to be hard. I want to be ready for work when I'm out of here and canceling classes on a day where it's a little cold and the roads are clear is sad and disappointing.

In other news my moods have been really good lately. I've been learning how to deal with things a bit better lately. Also, my writing has picked up a lot, my lyrics have gotten a lot better. Thank god my friend Hadley gave me a place to put my lyrics because ever since I started writing them i've been writing on random pieces of paper and REALLY needed some way to organize them. She gave me book that opens up to be hollow and has a great quote on the inside. It's probably one of the best gifts i've ever gotten. Well, I know this update wasn't really excited or thoughtful but yeah. . .sometimes no news just means that nothing bads happened.

Also, you can check out my new review of Black Swan on my other blog here.

False Memories

I haven't actually dated anyone in about 2 years now. So I spent a lot of time thinking about my ex recently. I usually think, "Man, I used to be so happy, what happened?" Then I thought about it some more. I've gone back through my memories and really thought hard and I've realized that all I ever think about were the few good moments

In all honesty it was a couple of the worst years of my life, my entire mood was dependent on her calling me and being in a good mood. I was in a horrible roller coaster of the road, but I had myself convinced that the good outweighed the bad. Looking back, I was never happy. I was always worried. So next time your thinking about an ex and you remember all the good stuff try to remember that nothing is perfect and there was a reason it didn't work out. Don't worry if nothing is happening right now, you'll be happy, you just might need to be patient.

Athena

Athena is my goddaughter. Today I spent most of my day watching her for my best friend. I love her with every fiber of my being. She is the cutest, funniest kid ever. Just under 2 years old and ran right up to me and said "I LOVE YOU SEAN!" Nothing makes me feel better in the world.

the funny part is I was with a girl who shall not be name long ago, she is my ex-fiance. She had me convinced that we should never have kids and kids are just bad news. I think I just went with it because I was in love and people do stupid stuff when they're in love. Our relationship got cut short by her of course, no real reason, I think i might have gotten too clingy. Shit happens. But anyway, the point is that I was thoroughly convinced I didn't want kids until my best friend had her daughter and made me godfather, turned my entire outlook around. I absolutely want the hardships and the rewards that come with being a parent. Now when, with who, and wether or not I will adopt is still up in the air. One thing is certain though, I want a kid.

The Kings Speech Review

My review of The Kings Speech just got uploaded here.

*Pictures are property of their respective owners.*

The Social Network review

My review of The Social Network has finally been posted here. Please check it out and let me know what yah think. While you are their please follow the review page and leave comments tell me how I can improve or movies/books you would like reviewed.

Thank you :)

*All pictures are property of their respective owners*

Starbucks is my heaven sometimes.

I spend a ton of time using the internet at my local Starbucks. The internet isn't great but my sister is the managaer and I know everyone that works here. It's great to just sit somewhere and have a good coversation and get some work one at the same time. Plus the drinks are great.

I've spent most of today trying to plan out how i'm going to look for a job, do school, and relax all in the same time frame. This shit is a lot harder than it seemed when I signed up for this life. Although I have this feeling like life isn't near as hard as I make it out to be. Hell, most of the time life is great. Maybe not great from some peoples perspective but how can I complain when I have family, friends, a place to sleep, a car, and food to eat. It's a lot more than a lot of people have, but at the same time it's alot less than others. Society drives us to look up to those who have more things than us; cars, money, houses, ect. I want to break past that and look at what really matters. To me life is about laughter, love, and being at peace with yourself. Satisfaction is better than excess. I don't know, maybe i'm wrong. I grew up in U.S.A, a country where everything is drenched in capitalist ideas and I just can't seem to agree and less with them. Not only that but I live in Texas, if I even say the words atheist or socialist here I turn entire room against me. The people here are very endured to what they believe is the "right" way to be, conventional religious values over all else. It's a hard place to live when you're me. It's also hard not to get sucked into the idea that you always need the best; the best car, house, family, job, ect. I just feel that in all this competition we waste precious moments we can never have back. Moments you could be sitting back and relaxing, playing catch with your son, taking a morning drive to nowhere in particular. I think what i'm trying to say is that people need to learn how to stop with the greed and competitions and relax, try to enjoy to one life that you've been given because once you are gone it's not really going to matter how much your car was worth.

Movie Reviews

I figured that as much as I love writing about myself every day, it lacks substance and any kind of real information accept for the fact that everyone reading this is ok and we all have shitty stuff happen to us from time to time. But I digress, I have started a movie review blog at seankennyreviews.blogspot.com and I would sincerely appreciate it if you would follow/look at the new reviews. I should have reviews for The Social Network and The Kings Speech up later today. Thanks guys. Peace.

Thank (insert god name here)

I finally have high speed internet again. I'm at starbucks right now and I can't tell you how happy I am right now. That is all haha.

Water

Today is out 5th day without water in the house. The Texas ice storm hit us way too hard. The water is starting to come out but we've realized that our pumps are broken so we have to get our well serviced. This really blows. It's been 5 days since i've been able to wash my hands or shower ugh. Maybe something good will come out of all the shit I go through at a such an early age. I'm really learning how to appreciate the little things in life. I guess you don't know difficult till your snowed in for 5 days without water. I've been working on music a lot today. I have a few ideas and i'm hoping to get them fleshed out and recorded soon. I'm hoping to post the music on www.purevolume.com and maybe get some people listening. Well, looks like I need to call someone to help with the well. So off I go.

Social Network

I've been snowed in 4 days now. Been spending a lot of time thinking about my future and where I am now. I'm wondering if I can accomplish all the things I want in life. I'm watching The Social Network again, it amazes me how smart this guy is. Even though a lot of this is fiction, Mark Zuckerberg is a genius. I know i'll never be able to match his intelligence so it's cool to watch it and sometimes i'll have a dream where I come up with something amazing and make a ton of money and never have to worry about anything ever again. It's a pipe dream I know but eh, it's something. I've applied for over 100 jobs in the last two months, calling most of them. . .not only that but I get this vibe like everyone thinks that I'm not really trying. Yeah, I would donate plasma for 60 bucks a week if I didn't have to. I hate the life I have right now. I would do anything to be doing better right now. I'm doing my best in school but my best isn't very good. I fool myself into thinking that it's because I'm not being challenged or something but the obvious reason is because I procrastinate. I need to get my ass in gear. I need a job, I need to move out, I need to lose 30 pounds, I need to get laid. Ok, that last one isn't really a need. I just need a new life. Something different. I think I may start this tomorrow. Typical procrastinator right?

Fooling myself

I've been snowed in for about 4 days now with no water. I don't know why but even though i'm stuck here with my guitars/books/computer I feel like not doing anything. I don't really understand it. I have this feeling like i'm never going to actually accomplish anything out of all this. All the songs I write, all the stories I come up with, and no one will ever read or hear them. I pretend and tell everyone that I REALLY want to be a teacher but I really want to be a guitarist for a living, I want a crowd of people screaming my name, I want to change peoples lives. I want to matter. I don't even know how to feel anymore. I'm 21, living at home, single, no job, shitty car, and I don't know if I will ever amount to shit. Maybe one day everything will work out but that's just a kind of false hope isn't it? It's very obvious that you have to be lucky to make it in music and luck isn't exactly something I have. I just need to keep playing for the love of it and hope that one day it leads somewhere. Oh well, no biggie.

Today

I've never done anything like this before. I will be updating this blog at least once a day. My life has been difficult for quite some time and i'm hoping that this little release will be able to get me through a little easier. My name is Sean Kenny. Welcome to my life.